Sharks and Jets

Recently I read an article in the Salt Lake Tribune online about a gang fight at the Provo Towne Mall.  It didn't sound like it was too big of a brawl; consisting of 13 participants who apparently did more strategic maneuvering than fighting.  Only one person sustained an injury; a cut above the eye from some brass knuckles.  I chuckled as I read the comments left by other readers. I share some of them here.

• Where is Paul Blart when you need him?
• The Orem 3rd Ward Mormonites trying to move in on the Provo Seventh Ward Nephites.  Two were mildly injured when struck with Books of Mormon.  After the brawl they prayed for forgiveness and vowed only battles of words in the future.
• It was the Anti-Lehi-Nefights.  They are the principle customers of the food court.
• Turns out it was just a church basketball game.
• I think it was probably Mormon Missionaries and Jehovah's Witnesses going at it again.
• The best deterrent is to have all the BYU returned missionaries practice their Spanish on them and try to convert them.  That'll disperse them faster than pepper spray.
• The long running debate between Sbarro Pizza and Orange Julius rears it's ugly head again.
• Pre-fight prayer..."Heavenly Father, we thank Ya for the chance ta...Ya know, come together in friendly competition.  Pray that we might conduct ourselves as worthy servants and that one guy won't use his brass knuckles...heheheh...and that we might all learn to be better gang members.  Say these things inna namea JC...Amen.  Hey, after we kick yer butts, meet us over at Mrs. Fields for refreshments!"
• What is the ward coming to?!

Of course, there were several rude comments directed at specific nationalities and religions as well, but I choose to ignore those.  I thought these comments were funny and of such you would only find in Utah.